Writing Stress

I wish that I could say that I've decided to add a post to my blog for any reason other than I am delaying finishing an essay that I'm writing for my capstone project (think creative thesis). The drawback to writing personal essays is that you have to examine all your "stuff." Was it Emerson or Thoreau who wrote "an unexamined life is not worth living"?

Liar. An examined life is scary. The essay I'm working on is about what makes a house a home. And I started bawling about a very trying time in my life. I picked up the phone to thank two people who really helped me through that awful time in my life and I ended up bawling on the phone to them. And then laughing because I was acting like such an idiot. Neither emotion reassured them that I was okay, although I tried to let them know that I really was. I just wanted to thank them again.

At the moment I have gotten to a point where I am about to write about the most trying time in my life, and, as you can see, I'm avoiding it. I've written four paragraphs in the last 24 hours. Not making much progress am I?

On top of this, I suspect that this essay is going to take a massive re-write. I'm not sure that the structure I've chosen is really good, or if it's going to feel long and boring to a reader. I think I have to finish the whole damn thing, though, before I'll really know.

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAgggggggghhhh.

Posting anxiety

I haven't been updating my blog lately, even after swearing that I would, due to what I can only call "posting anxiety." The belief that though this blogging medium is designed to be something different, to be less formal than previous mass communication media, my blog posts have to be perfect little essay masterpieces.

Obviously, my blog didn't start out to feature little essay masterpieces. I started this blog because I was forced to as a school assignment. But in a way, writing a blog is compelling. It's sort of like writing in a journal, but different because it is designed to be public. It's designed to be a communication to others, whereas a journal entry is designed to help one remember, or to sort things out, ruminate to one's self.

But I know that as a writer (future published writer), it's good to have a blog. Readers like them. Hey, I'm a reader, and I like to read author blogs. Especially Stephanie Bond who writes romance, romantic suspense, and romantic comedy. And Chad Darnell, who is a screenwriter. I check in with Tanya Michael's blog on a regular basis too. So, as they said in the recent Moonlight and Magnolia's session on author generated publicity, a blog is perhaps one of the best self-advertisements.

As I said though, I'm not yet published in book form. So I don't yet have any books to promote. And I'm going through this anxiety about posting--it must be good! It must be good!

Oh well, I'm really trying to get over that. I should accept the conventions of the medium. Write off the top of my head. So, that's what I'm doing now. Writing about writing once again.

I bring you:

The Tree Shepher's Daughter, a wonderful new young adult novel by my friend Gillian Summers, a fellow member of the Georgia Romance Writers. I admit, I'm sometimes hesitant to read my friend's books. What if I don't like it? So, even though this book was published several months ago, I have just gotten around to buying it and reading it. And luckily, I have had it signed by the author too! It's marvelous. I started it last night and I finished earlier today. (I decided to pick it up and read it when I woke up from insomnia. It was the wrong book to choose. I couldn't put it down, so I read from 3 a.m. to 7 a.m. If you need to get up early the next day, don't pick up this book.)

The target audience for this book is preteens and teens. It falls in the category of fantasy, although it's not the sort of fantasy that is on another planet. In fact, it's set in Colorado! That's one of the things the author did very well. The setting, a Renaissance Fair in Colorado, is beautifully incorporated. The author doesn't go on gushing about how beautiful it is, but you understand that because of the way that the trees, the stream, the meadow are incorporated into the plot line. The leading lady is fabulously written--a real teenager with real feelings of loss and abandonment (and a real twist too). And the supporting characters--there isn't stock character in the bunch. Well, yeah, there is--the best friend, the dad, etc. But they all are written as real originals.

I'm really looking forward to the followup to this book. Hopefully, book 2 in the Faire Folk Trilogy will be out soon.