Anxiety conquered!

All right, not conquered. Perhaps it's best if I say I slithered around it. I had two articles assigned, and I was having the hebie-jeebies about completing them, as I do all my work. I finally managed to cope with the anxiety that writing (or any creative activity that I care about) produces and get the articles written and submitted.

In the book The Courage to Write, Ralph Keyes relates the story of the writer who has his butler lock him in his office without any clothes. I sure wish I was rich enough to have a butler to do the same for me.

I've recently attempted to put a stop to using housekeeping as one way of procrastinating about writing. I think it's backfiring though. My house desperately needs cleaning!

From the Sahara to White Water

I am privileged.

I am probably the least wealthy person in my social circle, but I am wealthy beyond measure.

I have enough food to eat, safe drinking water, a roof over my head. I have abundant clothing, a car to drive.

I have the brains and the working body to make sure this continues.

I live in a society, in a country, that encourages me to live the life of my dreams, to work at something I love, and to change any of the parts of my life that I don't like.

I am privileged.

I spent six weeks this summer living in a society where things were different. Even though I was privileged enough to live with a nice, middle class family, I could look around me and realize that some important things were not the same.

I drank bottled water all the time I was in Tunisia, trying to avoid tummy troubles (unsuccessfully, but that's another story). My Tunisian family drinks rainwater. They have a big cistern to capture what little rain falls. And if they run out of rain water, they drink bottled water too. The city's water pipes are full of lead.

Bread is cheap there. I think it is subsidized by the government. Everyone buys a fresh loaf of bread every day. But cars are incredibly expensive, since they all were imported. Gasoline is expensive too. (They call it petrol. Fuel for cars is petrol, gas means natural gas.) The first oil deposits ever found in Tunisia were found earlier this year. They never have had the oil industry that both Algeria and Libya have (they had never discovered oil there before, although they have looked for a long time), so fuel has always been expensive there. In fact, so expensive that people smuggle it in from Libya and sell it around the neighborhood. Even though I complain about fuel costs here, it doesn't eat up the percentage of my income that it would if I were making a Tunisian salary.

And here in the U.S., I am able to go back to school and develop new skills (or work on ones that I already have). I am able to change and adapt as I care to. In Tunisia, they aren't able to do that. The opportunities just aren't there. I met a woman--an electrical engineer--who had been looking for a job for six years. Crazy. And sad.

And then, this past weekend, I went white water rafting. I realized how amazing that I went from spending the weekend in the Sahara Desert to being immersed in gallons upon gallons of water all in one summer. I realized how privileged that makes me.

And, of course, it filled me with all sorts of sensory experiences that I can use in my writing. It sparked so many story ideas. What an amazing weekend.

How privileged am I?

Discipline, still

O.k., so you might be getting tired of the subject of discipline, when this blog is supposed to be about creativity.

But right now, of course, I am sort of stuck on the topic of how discipline affects creativity. Or, in my case, how the lack of discipline is adversely affecting my creative output...it's been nil.

I am wondering, if, instead of trying to adopt new habits one at a time--primarily, turning off the television and setting aside a set time to write--if I should try to make the grand gesture and adopt a new life-style all at one time. Can I cut out television, write the Great American Young Adult Novel, diet and exercise, all at the same time?

In a way, I think it might be easier. Doesn't one bad habit just feed another? Don't I overeat in front of the television? Don't I use television as a distraction, and get so distracted that I don't write? And if I'm watching one more decorating show, I'm not exercising to an exercise tape, am I?

How did I come to this state of television taking over my life? I remember when I was a child, and going to gymnastics practice all the time, I didn't watch the television shows that all my friends were watching. John Travolta on "Welcome Back Kotter?" Saw maybe two episodes in my life. I watched the Fonz on "Happy Days" several times--it came on right as I got home from gymnastics practice. I'd lay on the couch in front of the tv, watch that one show then go to bed.

Now, it's a loud, constant companion.

What are we doing to our children, sitting them in front of the television and computers all day. Will they be able to cope with quiet? Can they converse with friends? What will parents do when they can't take their computer game modules on long plane rides? I know if I've developed this bad habit as an adult, then it is worse for children who have had television as their babysitter all their lives.